Disqus - Latest Comments for torybee

Re: "I Don't Even Know You Anymore!": Perceived Intimacy in Social Networks

torybee — Wed, 14 Nov 2012 19:31:32 -0000

This is a tough post. Tough because I want to write a LENGTHY comment and we just don't have that close of a friendship.

Ha.

Seriously though, as an introvert I love Social Media. I also hate it. I used to think it was a great equalizer but now realize it probably isn't. We just have more access to more people, but the relationship dynamics remain much the same. Folks want to get their platform/message out there, but don't care to invest in people, yet want to make it seem they're invested in people. It is all rather confusing to a person. I've finally learned that most of it is a game, just learn to play it. Expect nothing from it. But the more personal side of social networking is different.

I'm still figuring this all out. I really wish that it resulted in "real" relationships.

Re: But We Have No Artists!

torybee — Thu, 26 Jul 2012 18:50:07 -0000

Ha, I'm one that has asked this very question (to you!) and I do appreciate your answers here, especially the reason WHY this is so important. (your 'plumbline"). Have you considered writing a book on this? " "No White Walls: Taking Art Seriously..... in Church!" as the title. Actually, finding a title could be funny and a lot of fun!
But I do wonder how many small churches DO feel trapped because they don't have a lot of artists or a large budget to spend on these things. Or maybe even the reason why this is important. And I think it IS important. It reflects so much when things are done well;, when they are interesting and well thought out.

I went on a walk (for exercise) last night and was so disappointed I left my camera at home. The lighting was brilliant and EVERYTHING looked so different up on this mountain. I could go on and on but I am already too lengthy in my (silly) comment. But I kept pausing, taking in deeply the beauty that is always there but I miss. A change in perspective. A little lighting change as the sun made its descent. The act of slowing down to really SEE things. I couldn't help but turn my thoughts to God. I think beauty does that, and I think that's why we desire to create, to reflect it. So, going in a white walled, cluttered church is actually sad.

Anyways, sorry so long. At least I waited a day or 2 to comment. I love to reflect on this. And btw, my own church could really use some help in this area! I'll send in my HELP US! photos for a consultation. (I'm kidding). (?)

Re: No Cross at Church?

torybee — Sat, 14 Jan 2012 01:28:49 -0000

Ah, what a good, thought-provoking post. Personally, I guess I don't mind the absence of a cross if the substance and the story of the cross is interwoven in the church itself. I don't think having a cross in the auditorium/sanctuary is a "deal breaker" to me..... in fact, reflecting at the room we recently have met in and the one we're going to, I don't think there is a cross and in the move (my church will be meeting in a community center starting this weekend) I doubt that the "issue" of a cross has come up.

Yet, I did visit/church shop a church once and, after 3 months, it did bother me that there was no cross anywhere on the church grounds, but I think that is also because I started to realize that something was lacking and as I searched to figure out what it was, realized that the story of the cross and Jesus' sacrifice was absent...... in 3 whole months! The space itself wasn't creative or lent itself to what I gather your purposes are at Westwinds.... to enhance. It was sterile, a movie theatre "no drinks of food allowed"- turn off cell phones" atmosphere where the music was polished and everything seemed fake.

Now, would a symbol of a cross have fixed that? No.

I am probably off topic, but enjoyed reflecting on this. Thanks for blogging about stuff like this.

Re: Ending Daylight Savings: A One-Day Gift to Churches

torybee — Wed, 16 Nov 2011 12:33:27 -0000

Ha, there must be a horrible mean streak in me because I was so bummed I wasn't able to witness all this because my church meets on Sat. nights

Great list.

Re: Edited Snippets I Think Matter #2

torybee — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 22:25:53 -0000

Wow, this is a tough one for me.

At the beginning I thought that FB and social media was great! I enjoyed interacting, learning all kinds of new things about folks that would probably take me years to know, if at all. I've connected with old friends and overall it has been good.... as long as I realize that just because we're friends on FB doesn't mean we're friends.

I'm a melancholy, which supposedly means that I enjoy deep friendships. In fact, most superficial friendships don't "count" as true friends to me. So I've found FB to be rather confusing. Lots of information, but little actually feeling that I'm connected.

As you say, do we need to go deep? I suppose the answer to that is no, because can a person really go "deep" with 200 or 800 friends on FB? Perhaps FB works best as a jumping off point and yet, too often in my experience it is the best way to keep people at an arms length. It can start conversations ("I saw you went to the movies last night, how was it?") or close a conversation..... "So I went to the movies last night"..... "Yeah, I saw that, Hey, can I borrow a USB cable?")

Social media is a tool and I'm so grateful for it. As an introvert that loves my Mac I feel more freedom interacting online than IRL. But lately, I have to say, it disappoints me as I realize that I do desire deeper, more meaningful friendships. Can FB help cultivate that? Absolutely but like every other type of relationship it takes time and a commitment to engage in interaction. Real friendships are present even in inconvenience and it seems that FB/twitter is all about convenience. Somehow when someone that hasn't talked to me or even posted on my wall in a year writes "Happy Birthday" I just want to dismiss it. Yes, I'm sensitive like that!

Still, I can't live without social media because without it I'd be really anti-social.

(and yes, I know this is too long.)

Re: Blessing of the Beer

torybee — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 17:31:33 -0000

I agree with this; great post. I don't drink but am seriously considering working harder at it. I hear a glass of wine is quite relaxing. I really like your church's stance and involvement in this, as well as its discernment.

Re: Lies Artists Believe

torybee — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 01:27:48 -0000

Ha! I like that you wouldn't have guessed I was a melancholy; I don't really like being one! I guess I don't come across as melancholy because most of that temperament are reserved and quiet (I can be that too).

And instead, I guess I'm opinionated.

Hmmmmm. Maybe I'm not melancholy? But... sadly, I know I am. My church knows I am!

Re: A Little of This and A Little of That

torybee — Wed, 19 Oct 2011 19:38:45 -0000

Anything?
Okay, the most interesting thing (to you) might be that I'm going to meet your friend Spence at spin class tonight. Sounds odd, but it really isn't.

Other than that, it's a typical volunteer -at-church (to fold bulletins), pick up the kids from school week. Adding a bit of drama is my FIL that has cancer and had a heart attack last week.

I have a strange assortment of stuff in my life right now, but I'm trying to be thankful. Thanks for the wonderful reminder.

Re: Lies Artists Believe

torybee — Wed, 19 Oct 2011 14:54:56 -0000

I've been told I have an artist temperament but only because I'm irrational. And melancholy. And....

:-)

Seriously though, I completely agree and I had no problem getting up for 6:30am prayer this morning despite a late night. (okay, I was five minutes late but I wasn't the last person to arrive!)
(but... I"m not an artist. I'm just a melancholy)

Re: What Remains

torybee — Thu, 06 Oct 2011 22:05:49 -0000

Ha, I have never grown to enjoy the questions; I'm constantly searching for answers and am quite discontent in the questions that remain without answers. It's my angst and I have to say.... not sure what I would do without it. I wonder if a part of my identity actually lies in the angst and discontent in the questions.

Re: Edited Snippets I Think Matter #1

torybee — Tue, 06 Sep 2011 22:42:49 -0000

I'm in the midst of a social media crisis, totally rethinking the value of social media, and I am a person who thrives on social media! I'm much better online than in person, yet right now I'm struggling with it. To have "friends" that aren't friends. To expect to be connected to so many folks but realize: am I really connected?

I agree with your observations here and it is interesting to think on: would Jesus tweet or FB? Would he follow everyone or just expect us to follow him? Would he only follow his 12? Would he comment on everyone's FB page? What would he think of what I tweet?

Anyways, looking forward to your blogs and your book.

Re: How I’m Transitioning Into A New Life

torybee — Thu, 16 Jun 2011 17:46:34 -0000

Oops, didn't mean to double post! My apologies.

Re: How I’m Transitioning Into A New Life

torybee — Thu, 16 Jun 2011 17:46:26 -0000

Congratulations on all these exciting transitions! I know you'll be so happy and how blessed you are to have so many beautiful existing friendships and all the new friends you'll make in your new community.

Re: 7 Reasons Atlas Shrugged By Ayn Rand Is More Important Than Ever

torybee — Mon, 18 Apr 2011 20:58:35 -0000

I read Atlas Shrugged in high school and loved it (also The Fountainhead) and probably about a year ago picked up a copy of Atlas Shrugged at Costco (ironically, I saw it there again today) since I had lost the one I read and re-read in high school. Unfortunately I haven't gotten around to reading it again, though now perhaps I will. (so many books, so little time is my problem!)

Re: They Aren't JUST Quirks

torybee — Mon, 28 Mar 2011 12:32:27 -0000

I recently read Sticky Teams and realized that if unity really is as important as it states, then I'm the problem in my church. So these days I've been wrestling with just how important unity is and where truth fits in there, because isn't it equally as important?

I absolutely agree with what you've written here and I wholeheartedly agree with the whole "excellence" thing. I guess my thoughts turn to: If the goal is absolute excellence, not just merely "the best you can do", and you know the bar is set very high, do you (as a volunteer) even attempt to try to help out and do something? Or just stay seated as a spectator and let the "gifted/talented/called/ordained" people to do it and have them feel over-burdened? Or realize that I'm not the BEST photographer so maybe I should leave the camera at home and hope that someone else better than I am steps up?

This is an inward struggle I have often. I don't think anything I have to offer will live up to the measure of excellence required. Do I become a non-participant? Or do I try to help wherever possible with hopes that I can accept and learn from feedback? And what if there's no feedback yet I know it isn't as excellent as required?

Looking forward to your other posts.

Re: All the Cool Kids are Singing it Part III

torybee — Wed, 09 Mar 2011 00:47:39 -0000

I never thought music was that big a deal in church, but truly, it is more than "music"... it is worship. And when it is lacking, wow. What a difference!

And I feel bad about admitting that, because is my "worship experience" really contingent on the worship leader and the song choice? Doesn't that sound like I'm being the consumer?

(Btw, it was a guest worship leader; I'm not criticizing the usual worship leader in my church)

Re: No Way To Win

torybee — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 00:04:38 -0000

That was great.

Re: All the Cool Kids are Singing It

torybee — Mon, 28 Feb 2011 23:13:16 -0000

I haven't read your other 2 posts yet (I'm going in order.) I'll lengthily reply after I read them all BUT... I want to say I don't like to sing Heart of Worship. Not sure if it was because everyone else loved it or what, or maybe I just don't like singing songs I don't personally identify with.

I'll say more later. Have you missed me? (ha!)

Re: What I Want for Westwinds for Christmas

torybee — Fri, 31 Dec 2010 14:50:10 -0000

I must've re-read this post at least 5 times, thinking of what to comment, and I have commented and realized I was way too cynical.

Anyways, it is always interesting reading your blog. Lots of good thoughts. I want an abundant life too, I just get confused at times realizing what "abundant" really means.

Re: Best of Then and Now CD

torybee — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 02:21:09 -0000

It IS a pretty sweet chair.....

Re: Grandma's Rusted Car Just Killed a Reindeer

torybee — Mon, 13 Dec 2010 12:58:59 -0000

This is great... I love it and am posting it on my Facebook page. Oh, and just noticed this will be my 98th comment.... kinda scary that I have commented that much. Do I get a prize at 100? Or do I get kicked off the blog?

;-)

Re: Best of Then and Now CD

torybee — Wed, 01 Dec 2010 19:25:26 -0000

My, aren't your prolific; a new book and now a new CD! I'll have to put this one on my Christmas list. (not only did I purchase your book but about 5 more on Amazon last week! Yikes!)

It looks like a great CD and I'm looking forward to getting a copy, maybe after Christmas.

Oh, and I liked the cover art.... is that you? Love it.

Re: My New Book "King Me" is Here

torybee — Wed, 01 Dec 2010 19:08:02 -0000

Hey, I received your book in the mail today. (sorry, I did not see your comment earlier.... obviously it was fine to wait til you came back from vacation)

I've not read your book yet, just browsed through it but I love it..... and the QR code is way cool!

I'll comment more later (of course!) but I wanted to say a quick thank you and let you know that I appreciate you and your blog and especially how much you love Jesus. It shows, in the most un-sappy way ever.

Re: My New Book "King Me" is Here

torybee — Tue, 23 Nov 2010 21:54:25 -0000

Congratulations on your new book. It sounds good and I'm curious so I just purchased it. (however, I forgot to put in the notes that I want it signed.... I paid for it under my husband's name, David) You can make it out to me, your favorite, most annoying blog commenter. (ha!)

I'm holding you to "talking" to me about it. I love a good book discussion, especially with the author. :-)

Seriously though, from the description it looks like a good book and I'm looking forward to reading (and discussing!) it.

Hope you are having a good vacation.

Re: "How is my Spiritual Life???"

torybee — Tue, 28 Sep 2010 03:24:08 -0000

I've been thinking about your post now for days.... and it is a good thing I don't belong to your church. I'm annoying enough on this blog.

I agree with you and yet at the same time fight against certain things you said because it is so easy for someone to forgo any spiritual discipline and claim some of the points you made, but because they are lazy, not because there is no horizon between spiritual and "normal" life.

1. This bugs me because usually for many people, the "Holy Spirit" guiding us is just what we really want to do anyways.

2. I agree. It is a better gauge than just earning a gold star sticker for every minute spent reading the Bible.... but I do believe that the time spent reading the Bible can and should be time that transforms us into the type of people that are kind and patient with others and family.

3. Sounds so mystic but you are right. When we do see things in that intentional frame of mind, it is different.

4. and 5. I see your point.

6. My only challenge for my friends that might say that would be: What does your Jesus look like? If our image of Christ is not based on the Bible, it's based on what serves our needs and desires instead of who Christ really is. I hope that reading the Bible (over coffee or anywhere) corrects the view we have and tendency of making Him in our image.

7. I see your point, but every time I see the words "inviting Him into the mundane" I think of praying for car keys!

8. Romans 8 is good. For some reason I was told as a child to memorize Romans 6. Still know it. (Do I get brownie points for that?)

9. I see value in spiritual disciplines. I agree that it is not simply those things that define a spiritual life, but I do think those times spent in such disciplines are part of what causes us to have a "spillover" effect into the Secular, and in our day to day mundane interactions with neighbors and parents on the schoolyard. I'm a pessimistic legalist and wonder if many of my friends can articulate the Gospel. In my circles, it seems to be mostly "experience" based rather than knowledge based, and I tend to want the concrete knowledge base over the always changing, fluid experience base.

Yeah, I know I'm annoying, but you've hit a fresh wound. I do agree with you, but not when it is just an excuse to feel okay about not reading, praying or the other disciplines.