DISQUS

Ok, here\'s the one thing that really took me off guard. I was ready for the blood and the slicing and the pooping but what made me feel a little nuts: the tubes. Just before she was ready to blow, she had all kinds of tubes sticking out of her and going off in different multi-colored directions. There was one to monitor the baby, different catheters and who knows what else. I think one of them was a tube connected to a bell so that when a car drove over it, it would ring. All this coming from the mysterious darkness I put so much effort into exploring just months before. I couldn\'t be sure if she was having a baby or Cthulhu was trying to climb out. And nobody warned me.

You know, the title of this post pretty accurately describes how I seem to remember spending most of my college years.

That is spectacular. If only they made vaseline jars big enough for me to sit in.

Whoah, whoah, whoah. Slow down a minute. What is this vaseline on the anus business and why has nobody told me about it?!