Wow, BigNerd. Somehow didn't know you had a blog. Don't know why I never clicked through from your comments on my site. Anyway, got here through your comment on the Junk Drawer. I'll be checking out some of your other posts.
As far as the Granny with the Apple (you should have asked if her last name was Smith!), I wouldn't have been able to resist asking if maybe the battery was dead - maybe she was trying to thwack some new life into it.