DISQUS

Gloria von Thurn und Taxis!
The way she grew after her husband´s death, from party-girl into seriuous business-woman, to secure her son´s inheritance was amazing. And I love how she simply doesn´t care what people say about her; how she shamelessly states her often strong and provocative opinions; how down-to-earth and at the same time grand she is. And what a fun and swell woman she is!

Recently, I was often thinking that the thickest barriers in my life are those that I built up myself. I am getting more and more courageous and determined to break through those. Actually, I think I have already broken through the most "dangerous" ones in the past 2 years, through the ones that made me think that my life was in a way enclosed within a certain frame, and determined by ideas that were in many cases not my own.

Breaking through my own barriers and glass-ceilings of olden times is exhilarating and scary, but I also have never felt so alive and happy.
Today I caught myself thinking: "Just take care that you don´t get complacent now!" That´s something I would have never thought a few months ago!
My eyes are wide open now, smiling, curious, confident.
The barriers have broken down, I just need to remind myself of that every day!

That immediate effect actually scared me in the beginning. I wasn´t sure if I was strong or ready for it. Then I figured that change that comes from our own inside will come at exactly the pace we need it to come. And apparently I needed it fast back then.

Writing down visions for my near future.
Somehow my life has gotten unusually full the past weeks and sometimes it´s almost scary how much there is to do until the end of the year and after that.
At first I just envisioned how I would spend the Christmas-days. It was a very calming exercise that helped me put some order into my racing thoughts.
Then I envisioned the December- and November-weekends. And then week-days. And the little visions came closer and closer to the present day.
Some things I envisioned or wished for have already become true.
A wonderful way to meditate about life!

How insightful!

It´s true! I AM a water-lily in a way! And that thought touches me so much that I know it must be true.

My favorite color-combination is golden red and dark dark red. I love color.
But my favorite outifit especially for the winter months is all black: black tights or stockings, black boots, black slim skirt, black V-neck, and large ear-rings (right now Inidan style hoops with raspberry-colored stones). Then it´s all about MY OWN colors: my brown hair that likes to shimmer in colors like in Renaissance paintings, my olive-green eyes that I accent with khol, my lips whose color I enhance or not, and the fair skin of my face, neck and upper chest. I can´t hide like that. I am all out there, in plain view, proud, and all me! And I feel - and look - anything but blah!

That sounds dreamy....

Being. Just being. However.

No doubts, no regrets, no wants - not even the want to prolong the moment.
Just being.

Let go of those nagging old fears and self-doubts, and just let myself fall into the new life. With open arms and giddy heart. I want it so much!
And I am close to doing it! :)

You know what would be even better than 4? No worries about such things!
We can achieve that!