DISQUS

"Are we required to reinforce and positively encourage them when self-constituting myths are a source of what we admire and love, even if we do not ourselves believe them? Are we required to amend our narratives so that we come to believe them, the better to reinforce and support the best in those we love?"

No, and no. Can you give an example of loving someone because of their lies? Unless you've got a suicidal friend with a self-image and eating disorder such that telling them they are fat results in their demise, it is far more kind to help a friend to see what part of the narrative is true and what can become true.

I suppose it is odd for me to say this since the story of me is such a dramatic narrative, but it IS real because it is made up of the things I've done, the thoughts and experiences I've had. So, while a dull historian could relate the facts of my life in a dry and sleep-inducing way, he would not be doing justice to the true story of me.

And no, how could it be better to believe the lies about someone you value? Isn't one of the nice things about having real friends/ loves that you _know_ them including their flaws? It is not dishonest to encourage a potential before it is made even partially-actual. Or am I in such denial about my friends and loves that I don't even know which false stories I've bought? Please be a friend [my truth-telling version of a friend that is] and tip me off.