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John M.

8 months ago

in Loaded. on What Were They Thinking?
That's no woman, man, that's a man, man. Or a man-woman, man.

8 months ago

in Signage on What Were They Thinking?
<>

That's fuel for a first date, right there. Blind date? Perfect. Bring her to your place. Hey, what's on the menu?

8 months ago

in A Novel Take on Time Travel on What Were They Thinking?
"Somewhere In Time" is the first thing I thought of, too--but why do you need meditation or hypnosis, or any other convoluted comic book acid-dropping pseudo-sci-fi-physics, WHEN YOU'VE GOT A FREAKIN' TIME MACHINE!

8 months ago

in No Shirt, No Shoes, No Crime, No Service. on What Were They Thinking?
No crime, my good man? What do you call that green suit you're wearing? Or the ridiculous outfits my cohort and I have on?

Maybe it's not a CRIME that should be COMMITTED here.

Maybe it's US.

8 months ago

in Another Martian Power on What Were They Thinking?
My God walks on water ... and ... is from Mars.

And has a hammer.

8 months ago

in Roy Raymond, TV Detective! on What Were They Thinking?
"Gracious, Roy--that parrot speaks English as well as we do--and he isn't even an American!"

Ah, the unabashed ethnocentrism of the times. Nowadays, this would be read aloud with a George W. Bush accent.

Actually, Karen, the fact that he speaks English well certainly goes a long way to support the theory that he is not an American. On the other hand, he did use the word "really" instead of "most".

8 months ago

in Serious Question on What Were They Thinking?
Yeah, I love how he's more excited about getting something named after him than anything else.

Because in those days, being of use to the Government was its own reward. Kind of like teaching middle school is now. Poor bastards.

8 months ago

in Ever Heard of Research? on What Were They Thinking?
"Nyet. That would be a Hovercraft, not a Hydrofoil. The difference being that Hydrofoil’s are somewhat amphibious, where as a Hydrofoil is basically a boat with skis. The latter would be utterly useless."

I think the ... let's see ... second time you say Hydrofoil, you meant to say Hovercraft again. (Actually 'Hovercrafts', with no apostrophe before the S, would be correct.)

I'm still trying to decide if you did it deliberately. Sort of a meta-Zing?

Anyway, just racing through your archives and laughing my ass off. Love the site, and very impressed by the amount of work you put in. Cheers.

10 months ago

in Last Download on Simulated Comic Product
THANK YOU! And to the RIAA: you know who I am and where I download. Bring it.

(Edit: Not really. You don't HAVE to bring it, is what I'm saying. I actually don't like it brought. I prefer to bring it myself, so I'll just pretend that you brought it, okay? We cool?)

1 year ago

in SCP Remix Contest on Simulated Comic Product
Aw yeah! Eighth place, suckaz! Eat it!!!

Kidding. The contest was fun, and I have to give a shout-out to all nine of the peeps who voted me up to eighth! I'd also like to thank my manager, my pit crew, my filming crew, the second unit in Greece, my lovely wife, and the Lord Jesus Christ. Remember kids! Stay in school and don't do drugs! Peace! Don't hate me, Kanye!

1 year ago

in Visiting Hours on Simulated Comic Product
Also, I'd like to thank everyone who has voted for my comic in the contest--I'm only 23 votes behind Austin and GAINING FAST! (j/k) Seriously, though, thanks--whoever you are. =)

1 year ago

in Visiting Hours on Simulated Comic Product
I'm going with either "someone" or "EvilMonkeyNZ"--either he created the whole fake asylum and the guards, or he's there because of the wrinkles. The inmate's face is distinctive enough from the others'.
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