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Hello AamirJi,I am right now watching the episode on TV. I am also a victim of child sexual abuse. I never ever told this to anyone. I want to tell you my condition, as well as the feelings I went through that time, but even while writing I can't see the words I am writing. I am so full of tears, every time it I remind those incidents. I am not able to write anymore. Thank You for raising such issues.
Dear you are not alone. So many girls and boys were victimised. I know many of them, and myself too. Iwhen I was a victim I thought first It was my fault, and could not tell any one. I first thought I am the only one who had this trauma and misfortune. I thought it only happens to girls. I always envy boys, because I thought they were free and secure. But watching this show I realised there is no gender difference. I want to assure you and all victims that these are not our fault and its the problem of the abuser he or she had issues and they are mental.
And there is no need to blame any one else, god, we are getting tested for our courgae to tell No without fear. Thats the lesson. It was only a nightmare. Now we know what to do. So be brave and face all situations. Tell No when ever and which ever situation.
All abusers want to show their power on the victim. They want to show they are superior and the victim is helpless. I myself know the abusers were now sacred to look into my eyes as now I know they cant do any thing to me. And now they are under my mercy as Intreat them as scum.
In my life from 3-14 yrs I was abused. But that gave me the courage to face the world and study and now am a Teacher. I never told any one.Not to my parents, my friends, sibilings, husband. But now I am happy, for what ever happened, because, it gave me energy to study, as I want to escape, and want to stand on my feet. I never beleive any one. I never want to trust any one. I never want to depend any one.
So I want to tell all grown up who had the same problem, just leave it, the burden is not ours. Its not our karma. I got my hypnotherapy done, which healed all my guilt on this issue. So if you feel any trauma, guilt, fear get a hyponotherapy, so you can analyse your problem by your self, and its really effective, than any counselling.
Thank god for giving me an oppurtunity to undergo hypnotherapy, and heal the wound, that was for last 35 yrs. All 35 yrs I was worried snd alert, always. Each relatives, cousins, friends, uncles, co passengers, in everyone I was seraching for an abuser. I could nt travel, pray, sleep. when ever I meet people I was thinking when will they change thier form to an abuser or rapist. That was much horrifying. So after 14 eventhough nothing happens I was under constant tension. People who had similar experience will know. I never used to sit alone, always I used to be in crowd. Daily rooms I used to check. In home too I was under tension, as i was abused in my own home, my own bed, by my own cousins. So I was really sacred to be alone as a child. Till am 40yr and get my hypnotherapy done, I was under constant guilt.
But now when I think sbout it, a psycho rub his private parts againt my skin. Its like getting flue. But the trauma was severe, but with gods help, I was able to overcome it, and divert my insecurity to much fruitful ways.
So with my experience, I recommend you my fellow victims, to forgive yourself and if you suffer much undergo one hypnotherapy, and free yourself from all such heaviness from your heart. And motivate the children, and fight for this disease.
You're so right about the feeling that i'm the only one going through this. That's what i felt when I was a kid and going through the worst thing a child can go through. Just like you, I didn't tell anybody and didn't let it stop me from proving myself. I'ma scientist in USA today and teach biology to students. Wish i could get involve more in making kids aware of the sexual abuse and be strong. Well. one day!
You have empowered yourself by Breaking your Silence ! Have faith in yourself and live life with your full energy! Take Care.
I was a victim, I cried too but I feel braver now. Tears are not a sign of weakness, just don't let them extinguish the fire inside.Hugs and loveAM
glad 2 c...finally u spoke...well wishes:)
hi dear i knw hw it feels to a girl but trust me the only thing which can reduce ur pain is to believe in urself dear .........u might have seen other victims how such thing can ruin any person's life forever...........dard tab tak hi rulata hai jab tak aap use mehsus karte ho ........I really wish u forget all the pain dear har bure ke baad kuch acha hi hota hai bas bahar nikal kar to deho......god bless u
try to move up..
Try to share this incident with someone priyanka..u will feel light..and always have confidence in you .
Priyanka you have a lot of dare to face the problem , i say because you write these to share to a aamir ji so we all are with you .god bless you....................
its an experience of every child i exprienced fr one year when i was just 13 the trauma is still in my mind and now i want to save evry chid from this through teaching and generating awareness. childhood a stage you dont even know whats going in your life .and mr. khan you are doing great job
dont worry all will be just fine. Have faith and confidence in ur self. God bless u !!!!
Priyanka I know what it feels to share some bitter truth but I salute you and all the survivors for their courage.. U all are really brave.. Hats off.. my dear God bless you ..
hey priyanka!buddy dont worry!!happy u spoke out keep smiling neva cry girl!!be safe and strong!!!
Hi Priyanka,Its takes lots n lots of courage to show up what u have faced.U have now got enough strength to fight up the world with this.Go live the world with ur dreams in ur ways :) just be happy
.. My Best Wishes with You for Bright Future. Be Strong. Be Safe. Take Care.and live life with your full energy!!!..
glad to c u finally spoke Priyanka... well wishes:)
Hello priyanka...glad to see u came ahead with ur problems & shared it....Be safe & strong....
Hello, Priyanka. Glad that you shared your problems with us. It's very very difficult to forget what you all have been gone through. but My Best Wishes with You & All other Victims for Bright Future. Be Strong. Be Safe. Take Care.
Hi Aamir - Satyameva Jayate is a great show, and I have been watching it in New Jersey, USA. I want to share a couple of thoughts on two things that I noticed and would like to put in my two cents. (1) you talked about Good touch and bad touch. The workshop talked about "being touched" and there was no eduction or mention on being asked to touch another person e.g. forced oral gratification or touching the privates of another individual. In my opinion, this should have been covered by making the kids aware that you should also not be asked to touch another's privates . (2) Secondly, I would raise the point of who is the bodygaurd and who do you feel safe with. Since it was a visual, the kids picked their fathers and probably influenced the other tender minds that father MUST be the bodygaurd or the MALE member. However, this need not be true for all, the kids need to be educated that they need to find someone who will believe them and provide emotional support, and take care of the situation. This may be one of the parents or another adult they trust. Parents need to come out and be talking to their kids more openly and making them aware of these situations. (3) I think schools need to take this entire issue to another level by educating the kids and having an open forum of discussion. Schools can engage an NGO who is expert in the area of child abuse and can execute plans in the school and monitor the kids they may sense are victims of this heinious act therby putting and end to it. Kids need to be made aware that such an act is totally unacceptable and it is NOT THEIR FAULT if this is happening to them.
Hi Jaya, Well Said, actually i missed the program on Sunday, so i was watching it few mins and i thought the same thing that Aamir Khan would really Educate the Kids on the above mentioned points.. I have seen in some issues like the Parents(Fathers) themselves have done the Sexual abuse to their own daughters for many years....for which the ones who are brave will become very strong in their lives and the weak Kids will be losing their hope in this society....I am pretty sure that when Aamir has done lot of research for this program.. his supporting team will definitely looks into the comments and will take action.....All the best Aamir..
you have said some matured points that was missing,i hope your this message will reach Aamir khan.............!!!!!
Thanks Sundeep- I hope so too! I hope Aamir Khan has the right team who is reading through each and every interaction on this program and brining it to his notice. I am personally a huge fan of his ideals as I identify myself with the same too. The effort he is talking needs to be supported by the society. Again, thanks Sundeep for supporting my thoughts.
Congrats on Good Show, hope it will impact our society to be better.
Don't know whether they come under technical term 'child abuse' but two thing which you missed to mention
1. elder kids/cousins abusing younger ones. in these cases younger ones don't get wrong feeling until something big and painful happened. b/c they are taking it as 'private/personal' game which parents will not allow or approve of.
2. Growing up girls, with whom these people (trustworthy/relative) show affection and love, make them feel like special, those girls may or may not understand sex but they like to being special and loved. so, girls don't object until they realize its all wrong and bad. educating girls that these people are not right and these people are 'sick', hungry for body. When couldn't able to care about their wife and own children, how come they can love/care about anybody else.
Two things which didn't feel right,
1. In indian families parents/grand parents/relatives etc give 'thapki' in back of kids when he do some 'masti' or 'prank', so showing that type of touch in workshop can create confusion in kids mind. IMO this also can create confusion in people mind, as now i will think twice before picking up any child from low waist, or giving 'thapki' b/c may be kid take it as a alarm or parents don't feel it right.
2. Not agree with this statement that these type of people/abusers try to be good/popular with kids, it implies that anybody who loves to spend time with kids or enjoy spending time with kids other than parents comes under suspicion. This create a insecurity in society, i know seriousness of child sexual abusing problem and how dangerously it is growing. But just because some sick living somewhere, we can't put our kids in lock. Just because some wrong people are there we should not stop everybody who love/care our kid. It is difficult to know by face, but just because there are people who drunk and drive we don't stop driving, we take precautionary measures.
IMO law alone is a baby step, big step when system start executing it quickly, and biggest one when people put their children above those relative/people. But the problem is that it is like two edge sword for family, if they will file a complaint, their repo at stake, kid will go again that trauma in court and also that person's wife and kids life will at stake. If not, then their kid and themselves will feel like hell whenever they see that person and there is danger maybe he will start this with somebody else.
So, best possible solution right now educate kids about sex and to growing kids teach also about why it is wrong when anybody doing this.And whosoever think, educating kids about sex not right, then just try to open your eyes, nowadays in mostly 3-4th class kids start talking about boyfriend girlfriend, and older than 10 years somehow know something about sex
Hi V,I appreciate you took out time to write a detailed message to Aamir and team. Whether a child or a girl or a woman............they all have a sixth sense which tell them about the touch............whether its pure or with some intentions. In children as Aamir had brought out and also the victims had brought it out it becomes difficult to express or they become numb and scared so do not talk about it. In growing girls and woman............ this sixth sense can deffinetly help as they can stop as soon as they sense it.Yes we should educate our kids about sex. Its not only that our kids know something about sex but experience also. Half knowledge is more dangerous. Cases of teenage girls becoming pregnant is rising.But this I am sure is with there consent. Child abuse definetly is separate from this. Aamir had put it rightly.............respect the behaviour of elders or any one and not the age. I guess that speaks of it.
show was good, no doubt.
definitely sixth sense will help. but kids also able to say NO and tell parents, for that we have to win their confidence and make them bold enough.
Consent is difficult to define, you mean if anybody is forcing a 13-14 years girl/boy for something wrong, and afterwards giving kid a chocolate/gift/anything, kid know somewhere it is wrong, but agree and permit that person b/c he is getting reward for doing it. So, will you consider it as a consent????? That mean if in any cases kid is not having problem then it should NOT consider as WRONG???????
It is difficult to define or categories these things, basically persons are sick. By your words it seems, the girl in the show who get abused by 55 years old 'sick', if she didn't dislike it b/c he didn't do it brutally or if she was grownup and could not understand why getting tinkling so let him do, that mean it would be consider as her consent. Sorry to say but conflicting social behavior of this type of situations where we allow a 50-60 years age person marrying a 18 or less years old b/c she is giving consent, only motivate people to play tricks and that in return spoil our children future.
IMO, consent can be consider only when person is competent to think what is wrong or right. That's why in India, recently legal age for sex is increase from 16 to 18.
Anyways solution is same, educate our kids enough so at least they make a informed decision, boost their confidence in themselves and US. And last but not least make them feel that you LOVE them and TRUST them, and in life whatever will come we will STAND BY THEIR SIDE.
This is the small peom from me to all the people of our country
Kyu kahate hai log ki auratsehaneka naam haiKyu kahate hai log ki aurat narak ka dwar haiSaja ke kabil hai tu, janam dena tujhe aparadh hai
Nafrat se dekhti hai nazarenhar us aurat ko, jisne puchha ye sawal hai
Kaisa desh hai ye jaha deviki puja karna ek samman hai
Jaha dekho waha Durga, Kali,Saraswati ki jay jay kar hai
Phir bhi kahte hai log nariabhishap hai
Nanhe nanhe kadam aate haihar ghar me, khoobsurat taufa banke kyu log is taufe ka man nahi karte
Umeed kare kaise dharti matakhud pareshan hai
In sabka boz uthana uskeliye abhishap hai
Kab tak chalegi ye jung jahasirf aurat ki maut hogi
Kab ayegi wo subah jahanjindagi sach much saas legi
very nice dipti ji..... and very true u said thru ur poem... god bless u.....
I am soon going to be a first time mother. The episode alarmedme for the safety of my child who is yet to be born but it also gave me hopethat by being a receptive and proactive parent, I can give a happy and safechildhood to my child. Thank you for handling such an alarming issue so sensitivelyand educating the parents to make the surroundings safe for their children.
Namaste Aamir. I watched your show today and want to again thank you and your team for the good work you are all doing. I have a few suggestions to make. The first is that the child line number should be publicised at every school, television channels, cinemas and put on billboards all over the country. It will be like a national anthem for kids because they will never forget it. I would also make sure that your show is shown again and again so people can watch it if they haven't already. Secondly, there should be a law ASAP which is so severe, that these abusers and those thinking of abusing will think twice about it. It is pathetic that these politicians don't waste time in passing a bill in giving themselves a pay rise, yet they can't pass a law to protect children. Thirdly, the idea of the social worker saying that all the family members should sit together and confront the abuser is wrong. It is like a slap on the wrist. They should be taken to the police and punished severely even it is a family member. They should forget and care a damn what society will say. Their child should always come first. And finally, the education minister should make it mandatory for every single school in the country to hold workshops like you held on your show on a regular basis so the children can protect themselves. I hope they pass a law soon and that it doesn't take years for these child abusers to get punished. If there is anyway Indians abroad can make a donation or sign a petition to help you, please let me / us know. Again, thank you for the show and keep up the good work. Jai Hind. Satyamev Jayate.
Good Suggestions Krishna. I would like to add more(though not directly related to child abuse ).
we have to infuse morals into our kids. We have to raise our boys in a way so that our girls can live without any fear.
Dear Aamir Ji,I am hindi speaking Indian however I do see a need that this program should have English Subtitles . Can your team or Star plus facilitate this in your forthcoming episodes?I think this will help those people who dont understand Hindi completely.They will get benefited by the content of episode as well as this will add to the support towards this program.
I watched this episode with my 13 year old daughter. We were reduced to tears but more importantly my daughter started asking me questions and now she realised why time n time again I always told her to be alert always. Thanks Amir for a wonderful show. You really have woken the people up! Keep up the fantastic work. Allah hafiz.
i wana ask those who said "NO" ...........
i am shocked at the number of sickos who dared to post a 'NO'
i spport u as wll......wat is d damn reason dat they said a big ''''NO'''''......!
hello amir......i want to share my story with u.....but i dont want to give my name....cause till today i didnt tell my story to anyone......i am a muslim girl.....when my age is 8 , there is a "moulovy" start coming to our house to teach me Quran......he was a very good tutor......i learnt quran very well in within a year......but that guy not only touch my body, as long as i remember he even do sex with me.....but that time i dont have any idea what he was doing......i am speaking the time of 24 years ago.....that time we didnt have any internet, not even cable.......so i didnt know what he was doing......but i felt very wrong.....that everything is wrong......i didnt wanna near him...... i could not tell my mother ......no one.....after 6/7 months i was making excuses to my parents like exam or not feeling well like that.....i was so little.....but i still remember once i told no to him....i dont know how.......then one thing happened....he remarried to a girl like 15 years old......i think, for this, my mother cancelled him......i was a very little girl, so this incidence does not affect my life that much.....but i became very protective about my younger sister.....i made sure that she never stayed alone at home with anyone else......now i have a very good life......a very caring husband and family.......but not everybody is lucky like me......so i have a request to all the parents......please dont let your child be remain alone to anybody....please.....please.......
i completely agree with u
i completly agree with u
i completely agree with u n thanx 4 sharing ur story
Those who are against to promote the law...they all are not human beings..They all are in touch with those people who are involving in Chil abusing....
Very embarrassing moment for the country...... that we have the world biggest democracy and don't have a law against sexual abuse of children . It is very shameful.....for us
The entire episode stated about child abuse by people in and around family or a stranger. What if the abuser is one of your parent? one of your sibling? My mom being a gynaecologist have told me cases of young girls impregnated by her father himself!!!. how are we to alert our kids of such situations?
Oh My God !!! They are not Human being they are animal worse than wild pig.
Yes ... who will think this scenario??????? Guys Please suggest some solution for this too???
Hearing things like these made me loose faith in any god... :(
Hi Amir, I am Swarup dey presently from Kolkata. I just wished to know this country that whatever research says, thats much less then the reality. I was born and grown in Assam. When I was in class 8, I got an opportunity to go for a vacation in Shillong where my Uncle had some business. I was very much excited to go there and somehow I went there alone. I was there for @15 days.... and those 15 days were the horrible days for me in my life. I didnt ve money to come back, and he didnt allow me also. Later somehow I ran away from there. The most important thing is, this is the first time I am sharing this with anyone. So, I believe, there are lots of cases like this, which never came out. I appreciate those ppl who showed the courage to speak up, but I couldnt... Never. And i am sure, most of the kids never could share.......
U just did it...N so will many overcome the fear inside themselves..Its time to wake the world n just not let any other play with anyone...Dont let anyone be a victim