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Dese'Rae L. Stage — Mon, 08 Aug 2016 14:23:38 -0000

Yes! And the suicide prevention field tends to focus on a few "key" communities. We're committed to changing that. Thanks for your vote, and please feel free to share with your networks to ensure this panel can happen!

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Dese'Rae L. Stage — Mon, 08 Aug 2016 14:22:08 -0000

Thank you so much, John!

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Dese'Rae L. Stage — Mon, 08 Aug 2016 13:42:59 -0000

You such a weirdo.

Re: xoJane

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Thu, 04 Aug 2016 00:58:23 -0000

Deanna, I'm glad you're still here. I'm sorry your family is having a hard time understanding what you're going through. I don't know if it helps coming from a stranger, but I get it. I do. And maybe they're not surrounding you right now, but there are others who get it and who want the best for you, who want you to stay. It's been two months since you left this comment, but I hope things are looking up for you.

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Thu, 07 Apr 2016 14:05:50 -0000

Thank you. You guys see a whole different side of it, and I imagine you probably have some really great insights.

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Thu, 07 Apr 2016 14:05:02 -0000

Oh, wow. Thank you so much! Amazing. You've done more than enough! Other than that, just share the crap out of it whenever you see fit. And add me on ol' FB! http://facebook.com/dlsphoto

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:39:42 -0000

Hey! Thank you so much. I've been studying this stuff for years—I've never really cared about something so much as I do this. I want to do my work well, and I'm lucky to have the most incredible colleagues. I actually just came back from the annual American Association of Suicidology conference on Saturday, and I'm feeling EXTRA pumped about making some change happen right now. This article was published on the same day I gave a TED-style talk on the importance of stories of lived experience—to a room full of 1100 suicidologists, many of whom, you likely know, aren't exactly friendly to our cause. If you wanna get involved, best way to start is to fill out the contact form so I have all necessary info, and we can take it from there when I visit your neck of the woods. http://livethroughthis.org/...

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:36:35 -0000

Hey. Thanks for reading this. I'm so sorry it's been awful for you lately.

The thing I'm pulling from this is that it doesn't sound like your team of doctors is collaborating with you. It sounds more like they're throwing shit at the wall to see what sticks. This took me a long time to figure out, but: medicine is an industry, like any other. If your doctors aren't providing you services to your satisfaction, give them the finger and go elsewhere (of course, this is all assuming you have the luxury of insurance, etc). I moved recently and had to put together a new team. I'm still working out my psychiatrist situation, but when I walk in, I'm very clear and very firm about what I need. We kinda get shamed out of this, but self-advocacy is HUGE.

This isn't your fault, and if they're trying to blame it on anything other than what it is, they're not doing their damn jobs right.

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:32:26 -0000

Hey. I don't know you, but I know you're not a burden. I also know that feeling of *being* a burden, and I'm sorry it's eating at you right now. And I know (I know too many things at 2:30am, apparently) someone in your life would be willing to listen to whatever it is you've got to say—may not be the first person you go to, but someone would absolutely be happy to help you carry that weight.

I hope you'll risk it and reach out to someone. <3 Thinking good thoughts for you.

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:28:45 -0000

Hey, you.

I 110% understand the overwhelming feeling that comes with trying to find help. This is where other people come in. Have you been open with anyone about how you've been feeling? If so, it wouldn't be out of line to tell them that you know you need help, but that you're overwhelmed, and ask if they'd be willing to assist you. Navigating that shit is awful even on my finest days.

I highly doubt that you're a garbage human, but I get it. And it sounds like there's WAY more going on that isn't really helping that feeling go away. I hope you keep holding on, and I hope there is someone who will help you jump through the dumb bureaucratic hoops. And who will hug you and take you out for drinks (if that's your thing) or strippers (if that's your thing) or just sit on your couch with you (if THAT'S your thing).

I'm not an "it gets better" type, but it does get different. <3

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:24:04 -0000

<3 Glad you're still here.

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:23:21 -0000

Hey, VK. That's kind of a complicated one, and the answer may depend on how bad the situation is.

Briefly: is your friend saying they're having feelings but is keeping safe (getting rid of possible means, communicating with people/not isolating themselves, etc)? Then let them talk, listen without judgment, ask how you can help, tell them you love them.

If you're worried they're NOT safe, it might be time to take it up a notch. It's almost ALWAYS good to keep them in the loop, unless they're a danger to you, too. Here, you can be more aggressive about keeping them safe—stay with them, have others stay with them, family, etc. Help them with anything they're struggling with (for example, I forget to eat when I'm really fucked up). Again, ask how you can help—what will make them feel better, what kind of help they might like. You can even make appointments for them, or go with them. Cops should probably be a last ditch effort. They're usually not sensitive enough, and a lot of humiliation issues come along with that. I'd also avoid the hospital unless it's an emergency and/or your friend requests it. Again, sensitivity could be a problem, autonomy, patientizing, etc.

Basically: listen, be nonjudgmental, ask how you can help, show them you love them, form a network of support.

I hope that helps. Good luck. <3

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:17:20 -0000

Thanks for reading it.

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:16:49 -0000

Yeah, that's me! Thank you so much!

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:16:37 -0000

What Gracie said. It's okay to feel how you feel. Just tell someone about it if you can. And stick around, would ya?

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:15:43 -0000

I'm glad you're still here, and glad things are getting better. The whole process of figuring out what's good for you and what isn't isn't always cut and dry, and it's a total pain in the ass. Way to go. Seriously. <3

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:14:34 -0000

Several of my closest friends are fellow advocates who are also attempt survivors and/or have been a part of my project. We joke about it, too. A sense of humor ain't a bad thing to have. Just gotta know your audience and stuff.

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:13:15 -0000

I totally understand this. I'm glad you're still here.

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:12:35 -0000

That's also my assumption.

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:12:19 -0000

Protective factors! Whatever it takes, right? Keep that house messy.

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:11:26 -0000

I think that's kind of the working assumption—similar to how people tend to be at higher risk when their meds start to work. More motivation, etc.

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:07:26 -0000

Thanks so much, Mollie. I could have written something much, much longer because I have A LOT OF FEELINGS about the process of recovery—or, really, the process of staying alive—but I tried to at least briefly touch on key points.

One of the things I see a lot of in my project is people who say they have struggled for years and feel they will struggle their entire lives. I think *that* is the truth. I hate the trope of the "fully recovered." It makes me want to punch snuggly things.

Thanks for reading.

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:05:06 -0000

Would you be interested in talking about your job for the podcast I'm developing? Not interested in the gory stuff—interested in you, your life, what got you there, how it relates to your mental health, whether you see it as a protective factor, etc. If you're down, email me and we'll set something up! des@livethroughthis.org

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:03:24 -0000

Hey, you. I'm glad you're still here. Thank you for reading.

Re: Suicide Rates Rise in April, And as an Activist and Attempt Survivor, I Want to Raise Awareness - by Dese'Rae L. Stage

Dese'Rae L. Stage — Tue, 05 Apr 2016 02:02:58 -0000

Well, I'm not really sure about that second question, but it makes sense to me that he might ask the first. People who have "exposure" to suicide are typically at higher risk.