Disqus - Latest Comments for CathD

Re: Bob Nelson Comments on Dan Pink Interview in Corporate Meetings & Incentives

CathD — Wed, 12 May 2010 19:30:21 -0000

In spite of his attempt to sounds like he's defending the old carrot-and-stick way, it sounds to me like Bob's just affirming what Dan Pink said - that people aren't motivated by financial rewards and that it's a manager's/ leader's job to create an environment where they can ignite their team's intrinsic motivation.

Bob says that people are more likely to be motivated by things like: ‘full appreciation for work done,' ‘feeling 'in' on things,' 'open communication,' ‘effect on personal/family life,' ‘nature of work,' and ‘management quality' - many of which can be linked back to the 3 motivators that Pink talks about: autonomy, mastery and purpose. My sense is that Pink is spot-on with his 3 motivators, and there's a 4th powerful motivator that Pink didn't address - connection (which ties in with some of the research that Bob cites). In his book, Pink also goes into the importance of feedback as a motivator.

Read Pink's book for a rich resource of ideas of other ways to ignite motivation, rather than just using money.

Re: Nikon Festival – A Runner’s Day In Cape Town

CathD — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 01:26:55 -0000

Great stuff, Jurgen. Reminds me that I'm not fully enjoying everything Cape Town has to offer - running with quaggas!

Re: 60 Seconds of Your Time! The 140 Characters in Twitter weren’t enough…

CathD — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 04:32:02 -0000

Hi Andrew,

As I said on twitter the other day - I love that you're exploring this stuff. The process of exploring this stuff is what develops depth in our lives and personalities. Good on you. And thanks for inviting "input" - that makes it an interesting forum for other people to learn alongside you. Very cool.

So first I'm going to say the seriously stereotypical life coach thing that has to be said... nobody else can know or decide your life's purpose. If something jumps out at them from this page, it's because it resonates for them and might be something they need to incorporate into their life purpose, but they can't know what you're meant to live your life for. I know, it's a cliche, but it's true. Besides, as someone who values autonomy so highly, you'd feel shit if someone else just "gave" you your life purpose - you'll love owning the process yourself.

Here's what jumps out at me:
1.) You put the word "successful" in inverted commas. This word torments most of us and we're all a slave to the idea that we have to be "successful" but when we don't articulate what success means, we get driven by ideas about success that have been unconsciously programmed into us from the media. So I suggest you make ask yourself, "What does successful mean to me?" and "How will I know I'm successful?"

When we feel like we're unsuccessful, we're almost always using conventional societal definitions of success (how much money/ what job/ how much status/ how many properties do you own/ how many children do you have) - all stuff that research has shown has nothing to do with happiness. So write out your definition of success, and then question everything in it - the stuff that really matters to you will stay and the rest you'll feel really uncertain about. Then think back on your life and what's given you the most happiness - maybe that's where your definition of success lies...? (following the stuff that gives you a spontaneous happy feeling is a great clue to living your purpose, by the way)

2.) Separate the ideas of life purpose and work. Work can be part of your life purpose, but it's not your life purpose. Gen Y have read all this stuff about how you *must* live your life purpose through your work... straight out of college! If you think work and life purpose are the same thing, you'll place too much importance on work and ignore other stuff in your life that's a potential source of fulfillment (relationships, family, health, recreation, etc).

Also, with Gen Y there's this sense of "maybe I can skip the crappy phase of developing mastery and experience and just jump straight into work that's purposeful, motivating, deeply meaningful, and using all the things I'm good at" and become really well-known and successful when you haven't given yourself much time to develop what you're good at.

My experience is that over time, I've developed my skills and that's allowed me to make a more significant contribution, and that's what makes my work more meaningful now. And I'm just a beginner still - the person I'll be in another 10 years of learning, creating and contributing at work will be able to make a much more significant contribution than I can right now. Even if I knew what that contribution would be right now, I still couldn't pull it off right now - I don't have the skills and experience yet.

So what I'm saying is: you have a long life expectancy and you don't have to treat today at the final assessment of your worth on this planet. Also, everyday you gain more experience and skill and make it possible to make a more useful and meaningful contribution to the world (through work or whatever else), so don't treat it like a destination.

Take a longer-term perspective on the idea of purpose. When you're 84 or so, are you going to look at this year and evaluate your life on that? Probably not - it'll be more about the big picture. So add a little patience and recognize that anything you do now isn't an assessment of your life's worth - it's just another opportunity to learn something else. And, as sacrilege as it sounds in the lifestyle design domain, you can learn stuff in employment that you can't learn in self-employment (and vice versa, but either way, you have opportunities to learn).

So think about the big picture and your values, then ask yourself, "what would I like to learn more about?" and then look for opportunities to learn more of that.

3.) Control: You've mentioned the idea of being in control a few times. We all have a need to feel in control and autonomous, as though we're directing our lives. That's healthy. But be careful not to link the idea of autonomy with stuff like what sort of job you have/ whether you're self-employed/ how much money you make, etc.

You can make lots of money and be an entrepreneur and still feel out of control. Feeling in control is just a feeling and so you can feel it, regardless of how much money/ power/ status you have. You don't have to wait until you have more money or higher status in a company or have started your own business.

Feeling in control happens when you're living your life consciously and choosing to create the life you want - in all the little ways. And feeling in control happens when you learn the skills for feeling the way you want to feel regardless of the circumstances around you. That's *real* autonomy and self-control - when you choose your own thoughts and feelings and can create the experiences you want without making your thoughts and feelings dependent on events/ other people/ circumstances.

A big trap of the whole "find my purpose" thing is the "I'll be happy when" thing. When you're telling yourself, "I'll be happy when I've found and am living my purpose" then you'll put off being happy right now. And now is all you have. Be happy right now and all the "nows" will add up to a life of fulfillment. And do stuff that is an expression of your values right now, even if it's not the fullest expression you can imagine. Just have an interesting life, go against the norm, value family, be excited about life, and so on in whatever way you can right now. And all those "nows" of making conscious choices to live your values will add up to a fulfilled, purposeful life. And all the stuff you learn and the experience you gain along the way will allow you to make a more significant contribution in whatever stuff you choose to do with your time along the way. And that's about as much control as anyone can hope to have over the path and direction of their life.

Good luck with the journey!

Re: Yes! How Improvisation Can Help You Get A More Wildly Creative Life

CathD — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 04:04:51 -0000

I did an impro class this year and it was a serious stuff-shifter for me! Impro is a great way to learn life skills for thriving in this high-change era and to get out of your head and become more present in life. Highly recommended!

And thanks for saying "hi" on twitter. Great blog you've got here. And I love to meet other petite peeps who pack a punch!

Cath

Re: Hello, Elephant!

CathD — Tue, 22 Sep 2009 06:38:26 -0000

Love this post! You could totally write and illustrate childrens books that are secretly for adults (like "The Little Prince" and "Hope For the Flowers")

Cath

Re: An Interview with Cath Duncan – The Bottom-line Bookclub

CathD — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 12:05:12 -0000

Thanks for the interview, Carl - I had good fun chatting about how to do mental gymnastics, and sharing some of my tricks for how I learn fast and make my changes quickly and easily.

Looking forward to another pot of tea with you sometime again :)

Cath

Re: How Not Knowing Can Unleash Your Creative Genius

CathD — Fri, 04 Sep 2009 12:47:04 -0000

Hi Gilbert,

No sweat! Glad u enjoyed it, and I like your distinction about active & passive phases in the process - that helps with the whole Tao paradox of doing without doing, and all that stuff :)

Cath

Re: Rebooting the American Dream

CathD — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 11:25:08 -0000

You're dead-on! Most other barriers to doing the work you love the way you love it, when you love it, and with whom you love to do it have been dissolved. The final frontier is to dissolve the barriers in our own thinking. I think we're living in the most exciting times - if you know how to free your own mind!

Cath

Re: What You Know is Useless (Or Why You Shouldn’t Bother to Think)

CathD — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 10:38:25 -0000

I totally agree... always prioritize imperfect action (and real-world feedback) over perfect plans on paper or in your head! There are things you can experience and learn in the real world that you can never experience and learn in your mind.

Cath

Re: An introvert, in the wild.

CathD — Sun, 30 Aug 2009 04:23:26 -0000

I really enjoyed this post. I also recharge my energy by being alone. Where it gets tricky is that my husband is an extrovert and recharges by being with other people. So traveling together (and even just living together when we're not traveling), it took us a few years to work out that we needed to each go at our own pace and join the social engagements we felt like joining and give each other permission to not do everything together. I'm happy to meet up with people for up to 3 engagements over a weekend, and he goes to the rest without me while I chill and recharge my energy by being alone. When we're on the road this gets a little more tricky, but since we know our needs and don't place any pressure on each other to "be like me," we can adjust along the way and both enjoy the trip.

Re: Creating the means to match the spirit (How to Plan for Travel)

CathD — Fri, 28 Aug 2009 06:11:29 -0000

Hi Taylor,

Great article - I like your emphasis on not planning too much. It's one of the things that allows you to live a more agile life and see opportunities that many other people just don't see because they're so focused on their plan. Sure, it requires you to be more conscious, more willing to adapt, and more open to uncertainty, but the pay-offs are totally worth it, and you can learn to be more conscious, willing to adapt and comfortable with uncertainty. And thanks for the mention of my article too on change styles - you sound like you're a "revolutionary" who loves change :)

Cath

Re: How Not Knowing Can Unleash Your Creative Genius

CathD — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 04:25:43 -0000

@Byron: *big smile* Wow, so glad this was useful for you. You're right, recognising that anxiety is a powerful part of the process of creativity can help you to not get anxious about getting anxious... so you can relieve yourself of a layer of anxiety. I find that holding a question also helps me to feel curious, which is a playful feeling for me, and then that's a nice positive feeling that makes the whole experience lighter.

Enjoy playing!
Cath

Re: How Not Knowing Can Unleash Your Creative Genius

CathD — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 04:22:36 -0000

Hi Jim,

So glad you enjoyed the article :)

mmm... are some of us better at creating while others are better at executing? Sure. Can anyone use this method to become more creative? I definitely think so. Executers might have to work a bit more on tolerating their anxiety and developing patience and creative people might have to remind themselves that the method also involves setting a deadline, but I think anyone can benefit from it. I guess it goes back to the whole nature/ nurture debate... how much is "hard-wired" and how much can we change? Research these days is showing our brains are incredibly plastic and we can change the way we're "hardwired" quite dramatically. And of course, as a coach, I hold the belief that we can learn anything and even change aspects of our "personality" if we're willing to apply ourselves to the task.

And resources to read... I tend to lose track of my references because I pull from so many different resources, but I know this idea of "creative Tension" I definitely got from Peter Senge's book, "The 5th Discipline." It's a great book about creating a learning (and therefore more creative) organisation. I also draw a lot from neuro-linguistic psychology, where I've learned about stuff like the Zagarnic effect (you can google and find more to read about that), and the power of questions. Tony Robins has a very good chapter about the way questions work and how to ask smart questions in his book, "Awaken the Giant Within." I also attended a fantastic seminar with Dr Martha Beck earlier this year, called, "unleash your inner genius" (I believe she's running another in Oct, & hopefully the recording will be available to purchase afterwards. She only ever does a particular training a few times and then she's moved on to something else amazing). She referenced a book called, "The Talent Code" quite a bit. You can also google "Eureka effect" and you'll find more research related to the idea of holding/ building creative tension.

I didn't get this exercise from a book though. I made it up, and then tried it myself and got amazing results with carrying around an open question, so I do it all the time now, and I've taught it to some of my clients and they're getting great results with it too. Like most of the stuff I teach, I check if I get results with it first.

I'd love to hear how it goes for you, when you use it!

Cath

Re: How Not Knowing Can Unleash Your Creative Genius

CathD — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 04:04:28 -0000

Hi Phil,

Part of the tension is developed from articulating the outcome you want, but my sense of "Think & Grow Rich" and other resources in that genre is that they create the tension by phrasing the outcome in the present tense, as an affirmation. What's different about this method is that you're focusing on your outcome in the form of a question. My experience of this is that it helps me to relax and not be so attached to the specific outcome, whilst I "work" on generating solutions. I find the question also gives me a playful sense of curiosity, which I don't get when I focus on just the outcome phrased as an affirmation. Might just be my personal style/ particular personality... I'd be very interested to know whether you also experience it this way when you use a question instead of an affirmation.

Cath

Re: How Not Knowing Can Unleash Your Creative Genius

CathD — Thu, 20 Aug 2009 08:37:42 -0000

Hi James,

Thanks so much - so glad you found this post valuable :)

"I've always been the type that does research and try's to understand as much of the problem as I can before attempting to solve it" - Agile Living Strategies are a lot about helping people to move out of this kind of thinking (which we're all taught in school/ university/ corporate life!) and to learn to be more present and observant, and to respond creatively, drawing on their innate knowledge (which is always more genius than the stuff we've "learned" through institutions). This way we can be more agile, changing our minds easily and elegantly in creative response to our changing environments, and create more of the life we want. Do stop by my sites and see what else you can use.

Cath

Re: How Not Knowing Can Unleash Your Creative Genius

CathD — Thu, 20 Aug 2009 08:29:58 -0000

@kid: I think everybody finds it hard not to go with the first answer, because the uncertainty of not knowing creates stress and the stress response creates urgency (and closes narrows our thinking). It's so important to relax, so you can get out of the stress response and then you'll have better quality thinking.

Unfortunately not all bosses appreciate this stuff!

Re: Epic Roadtrip 2k9: 17 States, 13 Cities, 27 Days Later

CathD — Sun, 09 Aug 2009 16:27:09 -0000

What a great trip you've done! And I totally identify with your feelings about Nebraska. I felt much the same way traveling through Utah - the vastness, emptiness, dryness, toughness and ruggedness or the terrain is amazing! And it was so great meeting you in Denver, Carl! Look forward to hearing about your future adventures :)

Cath

Re: Are You Afraid of Being the Small Fish in the Pond?

CathD — Sat, 11 Jul 2009 08:43:47 -0000

Something else powerful about being the small fish in the big pond is that you'll be learning much faster than the people who are the big fishes in the small pond. As a solopreneur, I've surrounded myself with people who are smarter than me, so I'm stimulated to keep on a steep learning curve. As soon as you settle into a spot where you're the smartest in the room, you'll start stagnating.

Great post, Carl!

Re: Maybe I don’t wanna be a Digital Nomad

CathD — Tue, 30 Jun 2009 13:46:45 -0000

Hi Andrea,

Great to have these sorts of discussion, isn't it? And I love that you're willing to start the discussion from a place of uncertainty. I think we're all uncomfortable with uncertainty, so we grab for the first thing that looks like an answer. Yet we're living in a world with more info, change and uncertainty than ever before - I think being able to tolerate uncertainty (and feel happy in spite of not knowing), and giving up the attachment to the idea that there are right and wrong decisions - for me that's an important life (& happiness) skill in this era. And uncertainty is a breeding ground for great ideas and personal shifts, so stay there if you can...

My thoughts about your decisions and my own: you could be happy anywhere. Being bored/ lonely/ under-stimulated/ over-stimulated/ or whatever else is about who you're being, rather than what you're doing or where you're living. A lot of LIPs/ nomads think that moving to another country will bring them happiness. Happiness is just a feeling and you can create that anywhere.

Knowing that there's no wrong decision, and that you can be happy anywhere, what would you choose to do, and where would you choose to live... for now?

Thanks for sharing,

Cath

Re: Do We Pretend to Be Lifestyle Rockstars?

CathD — Tue, 30 Jun 2009 07:54:20 -0000

Hi Carl,

I really enjoyed this post. While I love hearing people's stories of their adventures or living an unconventional lifestyle, it's just not interesting, and can even be very off-putting when it's clear that people are trying to create an impressive lifestyle, rather than just living a life of being more of who they want to be and experiencing more of what they want to experience. Being REAL, free and fully self-expressed is the thing that makes any person interesting and delightful, and unfortunately being REAL is still rather unconventional.

Thanks for being REAL in this post.

Cath

Re: Is Exotic Travel The New Bootstrapping Technique? – With Lea Woodward

CathD — Sat, 16 May 2009 07:15:17 -0000

LOL! $1000 a month for rental accommodation in SA would get you a super-posh pad: no scoffing at that! (I'm from Cape Town, South Africa, and I know Lea and Jonathan were staying in Cape Town). You really don't have to live like a hobo if you want to be location independent.

But it's not for everyone. Lea focuses on teaching people the business development angles and other practical tips they'll need to know, but that's because she's already got the mindset that'll make this sort of lifestyle enjoyable. It's become trendy to be location independent, but it's not for everyone. I think you'll only enjoy the traveling location independent lifestyle if you have a particular mindset:

The mindset:
- "building a fort" and having loads of stuff feels confining to you. You feel liberated by the idea or experience of only having to steward the bare essentials in terms of "stuff". You're happy for "stuff" to come and go/ pass it on (and you don't get attached to "stuff"), and you don't feel the need to express who you are through "stuff" - you can find other ways to be self-expressed. If you didn't have this sort of mindset you'd feel deprived with only 30kg of stuff, and you'd go through agony trying to decide what to take with you and what to get rid of, and you'd feel really sorry for yourself when you see all the "nice stuff" that other people have surrounded themselves with.
- You love change. Some people like change, and they even feel frustrated and confined if they don't have enough change in their lives. Other people find change difficult and find that they enjoy life more when they have routines. I think you need to enjoy change if you're going to enjoy the traveling location independent lifestyle.
- You need to be able to question assumptions: because it's not a "standard" way of living or working, you're going to get some flak about it from people who don't understand or share the same values. You need to be the sort of person who can continue with confidence, even if other people aren't affirming your choices.
- You need to have mental and emotional flexibility and the skills to easily get yourself out of a "funk" or to think creatively and work productively even when your circumstances aren't ideal - otherwise the unpredictable stuff that can happen while you're traveling will really knock you around. At the risk of sounding cliche', you need to be emotionally mature and be able to take responsibility for the way you're feeling and not let other people or circumstances "make" you feel a certain way. For Lea and Jonathan to work together without driving each other crazy shows they obviously have this sort of emotional maturity.
- You need to have a bit of tolerance for uncertainty and not knowing, and even enjoy the challenge of being in less structured environments, and living with shorter-term, flexible goals, and living a lifestyle where you're not trying to control everything. Some people are happier and work better in a structured environment with long-term goals and alot of consistency - they won't be happy as a traveling LIP.

If you can run a location-specific business successfully, I'm sure you'll have the smarts to run a location independent business successfully... if that idea appeals to YOU, and if you have some of these mindsets of a happy LIP. Otherwise it'll just be a chore and you'll wish you stayed at home.

Re: How to Live a Nomadic Lifestyle

CathD — Sat, 09 May 2009 05:45:05 -0000

These are all really useful tips about th mindset that will make all the difference in whether you enjoy your traveling life or end up finding it a chore. Love the bit about "what you own ends up owning you" - it's incredibly liberating to travel with just a few small bags of stuff.

Re: Escape From Cubicle Nation – Video Book Review

CathD — Fri, 08 May 2009 07:38:01 -0000

I totally agree, Chris. I've read Pam's book and it's a really good resource that's grounded in sensible, intelligent and practical advice - not just a "you can do it!" motivational book. It's robust stuff!

Re: Entrepreneurship is not that risky, even in a recession

CathD — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 04:26:07 -0000

Great post, Monica

I think that our generation are recognizing the illusion of the security of employment, and we're having the courage to explore entrepreneurship. I agree with your posts and I think the most risky thing people can do right now, in this recession, is NOT explore entrepreneurship. Even if you would prefer to be employed, it's a good idea to explore possibilities for extra income or a plan B income, should you be retrenched. That way you give yourself options and agility, so you can thrive, no matter what's going on around you.

Cath

Re: Four Reasons Why Fear is a Creative’s Friend

CathD — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 08:48:15 -0000

@Alpesh yeah - good point! Everytime we push through a fear, we build our general resourcefulness in all life areas and grow exponentially I'm pushing through a big irrational fear I've had for 10 years, for that very reason: http://www.mineyourresource...

@Ibrahim creativity is about generating new ideas/ new ways of thinking/ putting ideas and things together that aren't usually placed together/ seeing things through new perspectives. Questioning is a great way to develop creativity. And another cool resource is Edward De Bono's "six hats" book, where he highlights some great questions to ask to see new perspectives. I think creativity is one of our natural human abilities - we just sometimes get a bit disconnected from our ability to access it (as a result of limited and restrictive school education systems, etc). To develop your creativity, start with challenging that thought "I'm not creative"

@Ranen yeah, it's an interesting tension: a little bit of fear increases creativity, but too much fear decreases it again.